Introduction Keikaku's resident jerk, Bob Vielma, discusses why he became a jerk, reasons why he shouldn't be a jerk, and how seeing Polysics in San Francisco helped him turn his life around. back to features		Polysics @ Bottom of the Hill I wasn't into Polysics exactly from the start, but I'm pretty sure I predate most of their current overseas fans by at least five or six years. This here nerd knew about them before they appeared on the first Plea For Peace compilation, and I drove six hours overnight to Los Angeles just to catch their one all-ages show back in 2003 (only their second trip to America, if I'm not mistaken). I saw them in San Francisco the next time that they toured, walked through the passive crowd straight to the front row, and ended up catching guitarist Hiro when he fell into the crowd, which scored me a prime spot in their "Peach Pie on the Beach" video. I guess this could partially explain how I became that bitter, old, elitist fan. All the new kids being spoon-fed J-pop from Tofu Records, and the Pitchfork-fellating lemmings checking out this Devo-aping band were ruining it for me! I wanted to be the only fan in the front rockin' out! I was the one who knew all the songs! Me! ME! ME!!! With all that said, I was immediately disqualified from being their number one fan. I hadn't even listened to any of their new music in two years! So much for my high and mighty posturing. I figured it was time for me to stop being a jerk and go see this band I supposedly loved. As I arrived at Bottom of the Hill, Polysics had a line halfway down the block waiting to see them on a Tuesday night. Inside the club, people were squished in nearly wall to wall. A mixture of punk kids, aging Devo acolytes, anime nerds and the like had congregated together to catch the show. I wasn't able to waltz straight up to the front row as before, so I had to settle for a spot halfway back with a balding, 50-something punk to my left, sporting as much of a mohawk as he could, and a raving e-tard to my right whose dancing hands looked like they were kneading nonexistent dough or working on a rubik's cube really fast. Polysics' set started off on a great note for me, with my old favorite, the violently menacing "XCT." This song has it all: screaming, manic keyboard, vocoded robot vocals and shredding guitar. Up next came "Kaja Kaja Goo," with even more ridiculously technical shredding from Hiro. Then a cascading synth line heralded the oncoming of "New Wave Jacket," my favorite Polysics song! Even if they had played all unfamiliar songs from this point on, I would've been happy. Luckily, the set continued with plenty of classic tunes: "Each Life Each End," during which Hiro quoted a lick from Devo's "Girl U Want"; the oddly anthemic "Peach Pie on the Beach," during which android-keyboardist Kayo busted out her pom-poms; and a cover of "My Sharona," arguably more memorable than the original. By the time they had played some new songs with which I was unfamiliar I had already been reeled in. "Shizuka is a Machine Doctor," played a day before the CD it was on would even be released in Japan, sounded strangely sweet. "I My Me Mine," whose goofy vocals are shared by bassist Fumi, Kayo and Hiro, and features a stupidly simple (yet GENIUS) recorder melody, convinced me that I was wrong to doubt Polysics' ability to rock my world. The real test for me came at the encore. Some mutual friends had taken me backstage to meet Polysics before the show, and I awkwardly enjoyed some small talk as they all caught up with each other's current lives. Their setlist for the show was taped up on the wall next to me, and "Coelakanth is Android" was penciled in for the encore. I hate that song! It sounds like a bad alternate-universe version of Andrew WK playing new wave. Hearing that song was the reason I had turned my back on the band! Sure enough, though, it sounded better than usual after having been subjected to a night's worth of Kayo's unbreakable robotic jerkiness and Hiro's spazzed-out wanking. "Buggie Technica" closed out the night, and it seemed really appropriate that I should get to hear one of the songs that made me love Polysics in the first place. Polysics better be in a bigger club next time, with more weirdos dancing for them, the next that they come through town. I'll be there, and I'll be less of a jerk!!! - Bob Vielma, concert held Jan. 30, 2007
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